Life is not all sunshine and rainbows. All of us have our cloudy, rainy days. Often, one is left wondering the purpose of these days, contemplating our place in the world, struggling to find meaning during these dark times.
For me, writing has not only been a form of expression, but it has also been a form of healing and self-encouragement. There have been many times where I write something, then come back to it later and get encouragement from it. The poems in this blog definitely fall in this category.
This blog is a continuation of the previous one, where I detailed some of my earlier poems.
I wrote each of the following poems as I was going through my battle of overcoming pornography. “It’s Darkest before Dawn” was written as I was going into the storm, while “Safe in the Arms of the Spirit” was written near the end of it. Looking at the two side by side, it is fascinating to see the shift in perspective in the roughly year-and–a-half between the two. The first focuses on the problem. The second shifts the focus to the solution.
It’s Darkest before Dawn
There are long, dark nights
When we cry our silent tears.
You cannot tell anyone.
It’s only you and your fears.
These tears only speak
Of our inner suffering and pain.
They say what we think,
“Has my whole life been in vain?”
We think of all the days
And the years that have passed,
And you can’t help but wonder
If this one will be your last.
You reflect on your dreams,
All the ones you want to live.
They seem so far off!
Oh the things you would give!
You imagine a time,
Sometime in the future.
You are on your deathbed.
(which will come, to be sure).
You see ‘round your head
All your unlived dreams.
Each one of them says,
“You’ve forgotten us, it seems.
“We are all the things
Only you could have done,
But because of your fear,
We were all shunned.
“And now we die with you!”
Oh! You cringe at that thought,
For during the past months,
You did things you ought not.
Then, from deep inside,
Comes a still, small voice,
“It is not too late!
You can still make your choice!
“You can still live your life
How you want it to be.
For you, ‘tis yet coming.
Just wait and see!”
You realize it’s you
That you hear in your head.
Your fear washed away,
Hope comes instead.
There’s this thing called “life”
That we must all live through.
There are always the ups,
But there are downs too.
There’s one thing to be sure,
That if you press on
And do the next right thing,
You’ll be back up before long.
Take heed to this story
That I have just drawn,
And remember: it’s always
Darkest before dawn.
Safe in the Arms of the Spirit
There are trials that we all must face
While traveling the path of life.
Often, what separates those who win and lose
Is as fine as the edge of a knife.
These challenges of life may not be easy.
The can cause us much distress.
Many times we do not pass them.
Then, we think of ourselves less.
Though we don’t always know why,
And may never find a reason,
You can be sure that the dark won’t stay forever.
Light, too, shall have its season.
The wilderness can be long and dry.
We long for how things used to be
Before we fell into trouble,
Or felt like drowning in a sea.
There are many things that come upon us.
That’s just the way life is.
But don’t forget what Paul said:
“All things work towards good if you are His.”
Each day is a gift – a chance to start anew.
Freedom comes when we realize that
We don’t have to relive the past.
We can leave it where it’s at.
Forgiveness is the path to life.
It’s the thing that sets us free.
It’s what breaks the chains that holds us down
And what lets me to be me.
I’m a Child of the Most High God.
In this I have no doubt.
All of Satan’s influences and sin
Shall all be rooted out.
I am the Bride; He is the Groom.
I turn away from each and every sin.
I don’t want to sin, lest I grieve His heart.
He’s my true Love; I choose only Him.
How does this relate to trial?
He gives me tests to build me.
Every test I take builds my strength and faith
That we may dance upon the sea,
Safe. In His arms.
Psalms of Victory
The final two poems that I want to share are the most recent ones I have written (as of the publication of this blog).
“Christ the Door” is one that I am including in my book about my healing journey. I wrote the last three verses one night in September 2020. That particular night, I was feeling a song in my heart, so I decided to write it out. I felt as if what I wrote was incomplete, as if it was the last part of the song. It was later that I put together the first two verses.
I haven’t come up with a name for the second poem yet. It is one that is similar to “Christ the Door” in that it is, in a way, a song.
Christ the Door
This is a song of victory!
With blessings I’ve been poured.
God’s grace and peace have rescued me,
For Christ opened the door.
I cannot say ‘twas my own strength.
All praise goes to the Lord,
For from life’s death I’ve been set free.
Christ’s blood is o’er my door.
For all my chains have disappeared!
The binders are no more!
Jehovah gave the victory
When Christ walked through the door.
For 6 long years it held me;
Porn’s grip had had me sore.
But all my sins are washed away
‘Cause Christ came through my door.
I’m now set free from it all.
His holy Name adore!
In Him we triumph over all.
Christ is King forever more!
Other Poem
When love returns one’s joy and peace,
A weary heart may rest at ease.
Sweet rest they bring, break from the strife.
Such is the way of the soldier’s life.
Who knows what tomorrow’s light may bring?
This shall be the song I’ll sing.
The blood of Christ has set me free.
He’s now my identity.
Yeshua is my one desire.
My love for Him is my soul’s fire.
He gave His life to save my own.
E’n in His death His love was shown.
Yet, in the grave He’d not remain.
He conquered death, gave me the same.
This life He’s given to all men,
But only if they bow to Him.
My greatest love is for my King.
I love the joy His presence brings.
He’ll not leave me to fight alone.
With His help the battle is won!
So, join with me and sing His praise.
Let’s sing this anthem all our days.
Christ Jesus gave the victory
To share His love with you and me.
Super Success 